In August 2012 I started the ‘afatherwithoutafamily’ blog. My initial reasons were largely driven by my own need to get my thoughts down on paper and off my chest. The reason why, my marriage failing.
Today ‘afatherwithoutafamily’ has grown into a real project for me to share my thoughts, and experiences as part of being a single parent. I love to engage with people, no matter where you are from, what colour, race, religion, gender, or relationship you are in. We are all human, and all feel hurt, love, and loss in a very similar fashion. Whether it be depression, anxiety, loneliness, we will tackle these issues in this BLOG.
My journey started late in 2009 when my wife and I separated. We had been married for just over five years and had two beautiful children aged three and five at the time. Since then, I have seen the very bottom of my soul, and experienced the best and worst my family and friends can offer as far as support. Sadly, my story is no different to many others, and this is why I want to share mine with the broader community. Not to appeal for sympathy, but to show other people who may still be in the throws of depression, that there is a way out. There is a way forward….
I currently live in Sydney NSW, and see my kids for two nights a fortnight. They currently live approximately 65kms away with their mum and her new partner.
I have a great career, a loving family, and a great circle of friends…I am also lucky enough to have found a girl to share my hopes, dreams, and disappointments with…an amazing women who has taken a few emotional black eyes from me over the past few years, yet is still here by my side supporting me. I am truly blessed…
I am currently studying a BA in History and Politics, and love the challenges it brings; I chose the content not because of any desire to be an historian or a politician but to grow. To grow as a person in the hope of being a better father, partner, and support to my friends and family. In reflection, this has proved to be a major ingredient in the healing process as it has filled a void that prior to undertaking the study, meant I was home alone ten to twelve nights a fortnight. Not a good place to be….
When my marriage failed I had to hand in my bulletproof vest, I became vulnerable and even today, still have it as an unrequested feature of my psyche…I am lonely yet not alone. I cry every other day when I think of my kids and what I have lost. I have reconciled my own part in the demise of my marriage and try now to learn from those mistakes.
Don’t be afraid to ask for help, it may come from the most unsuspecting source…
I hope you enjoy my writings, feel free to comment if you like.
Peace to all of you, not matter where you are….
I love your blog! I nominated you for a blog award. http://moutnaingirl.wordpress.com/2013/03/04/liebster-blog/
My journey in many ways would have been similar, and that’s the point I guess. Good on you for having the guts and the brains to do this, and bless you for sharing, and helping
Hi Karl,
Thank you for your kind thoughts. This really started as a brain dump, a way of helping me get through it by getting my thoughts down on paper. Even if one person can benefit from seeing that there are other people facing the same challenges, then its all worth it!
Enjoy your weekend..
Well done mate, there are times when I can hear your voice as I read the words. Well worth a read for any fathers be they together with the kids or not. Eventually, our kids grow up and move away, so your experience is invaluable.