When I close my eyes I see rain running down the window, it is winter outside, the fog, the tree’s dripping with their life. The flowers moving in the wind, ever so slight a breeze. I see my family, I smell rosemary, I remember my youth, playing cricket with my grandfather, walking in the rain, helping my dad in the shed. Playing football and the simple joy of holding hands with my girl.

I see the Jacaranda tree outside mum and dads house, I remember the fear of my first day at a new school, the excitement of that first kiss, music can take me anywhere…my heart rate slows, the breathing gets deeper, nostalgia oozes.

Images of my children pass through, old and new. Every moment they are not with me a drain on my soul.

I wish Don was here..just miss my mate.

A Father Without a Family – Tulon Gates

Tears will come, I don’t know why; I fight it for a second but why…they pass very quickly, the music takes over.

You can be all alone in this world, yet you can be close to your heart, embrace your emotions and let all the memories come out. We are only here once…

I used to live in the Mountains, the mornings were cold, the sound was bliss and the air was just different. I would sit and stare out at the rain, just looking at nothing yet seeing so much. Occasionally it would snow, the crackling of the fire, the way the kids look at me; they talk to me with no words. Of love, of dad we just love you!

I’m in Melbourne right now, working on the V8’s at the the F1. For now it’s back to reality…